THE SECOND BABY – GRADUAL PROGRESSION

The gradual progression of one of the most common female disorders, that of polycystic ovarian disease, with the occurrence of oligomenorrhoea and in some case hirsutes and weight gain compounds the whole problem. The resultant despondency can lead on to excessive eating, an altered body image and the attempted killing of all sexual attractiveness in revenge for her body not performing to the reproductive expectations built up over many years. It is possible to help some of these women to gain insight into how their anger is being directed at their immediate family as well as themselves.

With time to reflect on their own needs, as well as that of the family, one finds that there can be as much ambivalence about the desire for a second child as for the first baby, again particularly in those women who had no problems conceiving the first time. Couples do not appear in surgeries or clinics until the first child is about to start school at four or five years old. It is as though there is a sudden panic at the realization that their first child has nearly left home and maybe they have left it too late. It can be seen here how bereavement becomes one of the emotions felt by a woman in this situation, often leading to mounting tension within the relationship.

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